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"Those who don't believe in magic will never find it." Roald Dahl
This past week there was a lot of conversation about fear.
It was one of those weird synchronicity-type conversations where the same conversation was being had in many different circles.
So of course! I had to share with you!
Here's what happened on my end.
My 5 yo is being tortured by a 7 yo on the playground.
This older girl is known to be the class troublemaker.
She gets sent to the office "all the time" and picks on a different kid at her will.
This past week alone we heard of 3 little girls who were picked on, that we know of.
One of the girls that was picked on was my darling 5yo who was chased relentlessly around the playground until the other kids flagged down a teacher for help.
When I hear someone is messing with my kid, the Mama Bear in me comes out.
In this case, I knew I had to keep calm, think about what I wanted my girls to do, to learn and how to thrive in these moments.
To me, it is vitally important that my girls heard the message and learned it.
This won't be the last time they get picked on.
But how do you tell little ones about troubled kids?
How do you teach them they don't need to fear them?
We never use "fear" in our everyday language.
But that is what ended up being at the heart of this issue.
My girls feared the troublemaker would catch her and they feared getting in trouble and being sent to the office.
What we talked about.
If you stop running, the girl will not have anything to chase.
If you stop, stand there and tell her to stop, what would happen?
Or what if...
You stand in front of this girl say "I dare you".
How would her actions change?
I am 1000% this older girl would act differently.
When you stop and stand your ground, the momentum shifts in your favor.
I explained to my girls they don't have to do anything "wrong", they don't have to bust out their fancy Tae Kwon Do moves, they don't have to get in trouble.
Instead, they have to take control back.
If they face their fear, everything will change.
I am not sure if this stuck. Only time will tell.
Truth be told, I think this is a conversation we will be having our whole lives.
Even as an adult we don't think in terms of "what do we fear", instead we consciously or subconsciously avoid things for the fear of failure or looking foolish or getting in trouble.
What would happen if we pick one fear, brought it to conscious and then stood our ground and said: "I dare you"?
Everything would change.
Lead Ladies Lead.
--> On the note of fear and bullies, being honest brings out the good in others. Did you see this boy talk about his bullying? And then the amazing follow up by so many others. (To me, both videos show leaders.)
--> Not every invention is a good thing. San Fran is restricting the number of delivery robots that can use the sidewalks and cross streets! Proof: an annoying invention is an invention!
--> Let's talk important things... Starbucks is giving away $1 million worth of gift cards from now until December 23rd! Simply attend a festive event in your local community and seek out the Starbuck's Baristas!
--> 16 Apps to Make Your Phone the Best Personal Assistant Ever. My favorites use LinkedIn, Shazam, Spotify, Google Drive and am definitely going to check out TunnelBear now!
--> Give thanks to the right timing and The Silence Breakers. Two months ago a story came out about Harvey Weinstein and his misconduct. Now over 100 women are telling their Harvey stories and so many more stories about so many more powerful men. What's great is we can all feel an active shift away from a cultural norm. These women aren't the first to speak up but there's something in the today's momentum that the era of treating women however you want, is coming to an end. Halleluah!
Awesome Female Entrepreneur.
I want to feature everyday women entrepreneurs. We are all leading. All managing and all giving. You are all doing all of that. And I want to show you proof, we'll start by honoring more women entrepreneurs by hearing directly from them!
It's only fitting, to me, start this series by sharing with you a wonderful woman who has been kind, generous and helps me out every single day, Courtney Carrera.
• How do you show up as a Leader?
I think my constant pursuance of personal growth and education sets me up as a leader. I firmly believe in continually learning and evolving as a person, and I think that resonates with people. I do not allow myself to get stagnant and am usually, the first to dive headfirst into something unknown (because I know I can always educate myself)
• What's one way you manage your life that you feel you have mastered?
Ahh!! Mastered? I feel like there is always room for improvement in everything but the part of my life I do well is managing a work-life balance. My husband works 80-100 hours a week, so it is so important that I am available for my kids. I work while they are at school, I am there for drop-off and pick-up, I am available to take impromptu road trips and vacations, and most importantly I am present. It is so easy, especially as a virtual entrepreneur, to get sucked into the computer or phone but I have managed to create a schedule and life that allows for me to be consistently present and available in their lives.
• How do you give to your community?
Most recently I participated in fundraising for St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital as a St. Jude Hero. Other than volunteering and fundraising, I think an essential part of giving to the community is raising respectful, gracious, and giving children.
Last but not least.
--> I am so happy to be a part of the Viral Content Summit! There are some super amazing speakers and women that talk all things online business! Me? I talk about how I am the only person I know who has kept their New Year's Resolution. Really. I have done it now 3x over and share the insight there! Join the Waiting List here!
Quick side note from Ashleigh. Here are my most favorite tools ever.
- For audio motivation - Relentless by Tim Grover. I listen to him as I was in the mornings. My walk always becomes a power walk after listening.
- To focus during the day I love to focus@will. They say music helps you focus and for me it surely does. I blare the classical music. I am not sure how many people my age choose that over techno but either way I love it.
- Rosemarie Groner (from the Busy Budgeter) is a friend and I just LOVE how much she gives everything away. She tells you and anyone she can her detailed way to making money! Start with her Pinterest Strategy Guide that is worth every penny. Not. going. to. lie.