"I don't mean this in a stuck-up way,
but I needed an attitude song."
- Gwen Stefani
I have been thinking a lot about triggers lately. I have a good life. I have a husband who loves me and supports me, my kids are smart and seem happy - in between all their fighting - of course. I live in a nice neighborhood in a sunny town with friends I can call and call on any day of the week. I want for nothing that I cannot go out and get.
Crazy blessed life right?
And yet I have tons of ups and downs. I think part of that is as a parent, you never know if what you are doing is really what's best and you are making these decisions with little sleep and minimizing patience after having said NO for the gagillionth time that day. I mean, I swore I would never say "because I said so" but man, sometimes that's really the best you've got and it's the only answer you have between that and not going yelling out some crazy answer!
THEN as an entrepreneur - hello - you know there are many ups and downs. Robert from Shark Tank said an entrepreneur has to have a sense of paranoia too. Paraphrased there but you do!
THEN bring on our internal voices and our pre-programmed triggers and really you could have a messed of a life. Even in a crazy blessed life.
I have been working on understanding my triggers, as they happen and then managing them, controlling them and using them for my benefit.
Here's an example.
I was in an OrangeTheory class the other day. My classes has 1 row of treadmills, one row of rowers and 2 stationary bikes for those who need it. I think other OT's are set up differently but this is mine. Well, I don't like to use the rower even though I rowed in high school. I just don't like it. I am so over the rower. I have no motivation on it, I don't get the splat points I want, etc etc. So when it's time to use the rower I seek out the bike. The bike that I love. Really, LOVE. And here in this class I was merrily going between the strength training to bike. Strength training to bike. Then the instructor switched our exercises and as she was explaining the new, this woman walked around the instructor WHILE she was talking and snagged my bike.
Even as I write this now, I can feel my arms get tingly, my mind switch to anger, and my passion come out. The woman SNAGGED MY BIKE! She full on knew I was using it. She full on knew the other one was not available. She full on went around the talking instructor to make sure she got to the bike before I DID. She intentionally and inappropriately snagged my bike! In the middle of class! (Can you feel the blood going up my neck?)
Why does this bother me so much? It was completely rude, completely selfish and completely unfair.
Fire in my belly. Fire. Fire. Fire.
What did I do? Nothing. I asked the instructor if I could use the treadmill (not common in this situation) but she saw the woman SNAGGED MY BIKE.
And I recognized my trigger.
And I pushed even harder with that fire in my belly.
I did what I thought was socially appropriate. I let the woman be instead of "going mama bear on her" and I used my fire to push harder in what I wanted to do. Get more splat points.
It's a semi-superficial example. Who cares about a workout class and silly bike? Why did it bother me so much?
But in the end, the most important thing, the thing I am learning, is that when the triggers are activated, instead of going mama bear on her, I went mama bear to benefit me!
See the switch?
Not on her.
But FOR ME.
Tim Grover, trainer to Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant, talks about how he INTENTIONALLY finds the triggers in his clients. So that they can then work on controlling it. Brilliant right? What awesomeness could explode when your inner Sasha Fierce and Mama Bear come out when you want them too.
Think on it. Think on your triggers. Watch for them.
And then put on your attitude song and roll with it.
--> Simple Acts. Last week we talked about how impactful your simple acts are. Whether it's a note of kindness, telling someone they are doing a great job or even telling yourself that. Simple acts everyday is what smoothes the rock in the river.
--> Priceline Founders says talks about the difference between leaders and managers. Cliff notes version. "You work for you." He says: "I would correct you right out of the box. My style is not to perpetuate a false illusion that you work for me. You work for you. You get up every day and you come in here because you want to be here. We're not having a discussion about who's in charge. If you have a better idea, great. Let's hear it."
--> Facebook made a killing when it made advertisements a consumer product. Literally there are millions of people (giving Facebook billions) to take their stab at Facebook ads. Looks like Apple is a bit jealous and wants in on the action too. Cliff notes version: Micro-advertising is coming to Apple News.
--> AND while we are on the topic of "micro advertising" I know a bunch of people who are playing around with Pinterest ads. Pinterest? Don't knock it. Test it. Pinterest is the #2 search engine after Facebook. (Nope, Google is #3 in line here.) AND Pinterests users is 80% women. If that's your target, then think on it. Here's a post to get you started.
--> LiveChat. Think on it. Install it. Then come back and say thank you.
--> Is Insta your jam? Okay okay okay... IG recently changed their algorithm and everyone's engagement levels got crushed. BUT if you engagement levels were solid before the change, say before June 2017, this list shows what brands think of your different engagement rates. Cliff notes version: If your engagement rate is 5-8% you're basically crushing it! 3-5% you're doing good. 1.5-3% You doing alright. Not bad. Not great. Think of it as room for improvement. Also remember we talked of Kate Casey? Her IG engagement rate is consistently 8-10% which is hugely rare!
--> Are you guys watching America's Got Talent? I am with my girls and legit tears flowed when I watched the 13 year old sing her heart out. Not once but twice I cried. May we all let out our old soul.
--> Give yourself a good meal, dirt cheap and have a little fun with it. I mean anything from Trader Joe's is fun right??
--> Will you reply back and give your favorite "attitude song"? Mine is definitely Eminem's Lose Yourself.